Depending on your constraints (you didn’t list them) look at a Toyota RAV4, a Toyota Highlander, or a Lexus RX350 (maintenance/repairs on the Lexus will be higher compared to the Toyota’s in the long run).  If you plan to do any overlanding, then get a Toyota 4Runner (but fuel economy will be average at best).

i am shooting for a 4Runner myself

I do like the 4Runner. Dependable and comfortable. If not that, I would say look at a Lexus.

yea you can find excellent used Lexus SUVs all over the place

you mentioned fuel efficient though..doesn't really go with SUV

I don't understand the popularity of SUVs..they are gas guzzlers and unless you use them for a specific purpose i.e work or your geographic location calls for it they are impractical for most people . Seems like people want them because they see other people driving them. The right hatchback can be great on gas, comfortable, easy to park, not be a big target for thieves AND give you decent space for moving items with the seats down

If you don't need to tow, I'd say Rav4; the new ones gets good gas mileage for a SUV, and Toyota brought back the Venza for 2021, but it's only available as a hybrid. Highlander can tow if you need to, gets decent gas mileage for the next size up and it's roomier than the Rav4. 4-Runner similar in size to the Highlander but taller, beefier and more rugged, but comes at a price as the gas mileage is average. All of these except for 4-Runner come in Hybrid form so they'll have the best fuel economy.  

All the new ones are comfortable so depends on what you need the SUV to do for you in retirement. I'll be thinking about this same question in about 4 yrs. from now, highly likely whatever I get, it will be a Toyota of some sort.